Girl Scout Cookies!
by Gina Christine
Summary: Nessie joins Girl Scouts. Emmett helps her sell some cookies! What happens when Newton's little girl, Paige is a Girl Scout, too? A battle of epic preportions! No. But some things will surprise you! Rated T for minor swearing. Or else it would be rated K!


Disclaimer...

Gina-No. I'm sorry. I sold all ownage to Twilight on the Internet.

Emmett-[slaps] No. You never owned it!

Liz-How would you know?

Emmett-Do you want slapped too!?

Liz-No sir.

Gina- We don't own Twilight. Ever. Or Wal-Mart.

EmPOV.

Nessie finally convinced me to help her sell Girl scout Cookies. Those things are NASTY! But what ever floats her half-vamp boat. She looks like she's about seven years old. But she's only like... three years old, maybe. "Ready to go, Uncle Emmy?" She called from the other room.

"Ya, Ness! One second!" Literally. Here goes nothing.

We walked quickly into their little meeting spot. All they had there were little chairs that I tried to sit in. I now owe them twenty bucks for the chair... great.

"Okay. Today we are going to discuss our cookie sales!" said the really old lady. I guess she was the leader of the munchkins. She smelled like rubber cement. I would know. I couldn't believe it. Newton was there. With a mini-girl-Newton. Oh hell no. He was going down. "The girl who sells the most boxes of cookies will win a brand new bike!" the rubber cement lady screamed.

"Ness, you have to win this," I said a vamp speed so Newton wouldn't hear. She already had like five bikes. But I don't care.

"Uncle Emmy, I already have six bikes. I think I should give the other girls a chance," Edward was rubbing off on her. Never. I have to keep her away from him. He was making her soft. Like a freaking teddy bear.

"You see that girl over there?" I pointed to the little brunette girl standing by Newton. Nessie nodded. "She doesn't like you. I heard her talking about her kicking your butt," this was going to work! Woot!

"Oh no, she didn't! She's going down! I'm gonna go get a juice box! You want anything?" She whispered.

"Very funny, Ness!" Renesmee gave mini-Newton the stink-eye the whole way to the treat table. It was quite hilarious.

The next day we were on our way to the local Wally-World to set up our table. I bought a lot of glitter glue yesterday and made a huge sign to put on our table. It was pretty fan-freaking-tastic, if I do say so myself! Then something ruined my whole day in a matter of seconds. "Hi! I'm Paige Newton!" the mini-Newton said, "This is my dad Mike and my mom Jess!"

I finally understood why Jessica Stanley missed so much school a few years back. She was knocked up with Newton's kid! "Hi," Nessie said bluntly and walked away. She really believed me when I said that Paige was evil! Fantastic!

"Cullen? Is that you?" Newton asked. I figured I'd mess with his head a bit. It would be hilarious.

"Es tut mir leid. Ich spreche kein Englisch," Thank God for Nessie teaching me German! It actually came in handy!

"Cullen, I know that's you. You look exactly the same!" Dang him!

"Yes, Newton. It is I. Emmett Dale McCarty Cullen!" I said way to dramatically. If he thought I was crazy, maybe he would leave and never come back. Ever.

"And who do we have here?" Jessica squeezed Nessie's cheek. She just glared at her. It was impossible for Ness not to look cute, though. "This your kid, Emmett?" She was talking to me like were best friends or something. What the hello kitty?! She used to think that the Cullens were freaks.

"No. She's Bella and Edward's little girl," Jessica looked at me like I was crazy. She tried to add up the time that we graduated in her small little brain.

"Did they adopt her? I mean she looks seven," She whispered. Of course Nessie could hear her though. Nessie looked exactally like Edward. How could anyone think she was adopted?

"Nope. She's all theirs. Born September 10, 2006," Crap. Oh crap. Emmett. Count backwards... 2009, 2008, 2007, 2006, 2005, 2004, 2003, 2002. Okay. 2002. "I meant September 10, 2002. Yup. 2002. She's seven years old!" Nessie just rolled her eyes at my stupidity. I glared at her.

"What's your name sweetie?" Newton asked.

"My name is Renesmee Carlie Cullen. And I plan on kicking your butt at this," Newton, Jessica, and Paige just walked away. I gave my neice a high five.

"Go Girl!" I screamed.

"Daddy says I'm not allowed to listen to that song. He says its inappropriate for my age group," This child is deprived.

"I'll just have to fix that, now won't I? I'll play the CD in the car for you," Nessie and I smiled as we waited for our first lucky costumer.

"Hello, My name's Nessie! Would you like to buy some cookies?" Nessie asked in her cutest voice. There was noway this guy could say no to her cuteness.

"Sure! I'll take two boxes of Thin Mints!" Nessie handed the skater dude two boxes of cookies after he handed her like four dollars or something. I glanced at the pile of cookies on the table.

"Two boxes down, ninety-eight more to go!" I said. I was uber exicted.

"This is going to be a long day," Nessie groaned. I looked over to my right. Newton set up a table one the other side of the sidewalk! How dare he! He only had about 50 boxes left.

"Turn up the charm, Ness. I'll be right back," And with that I wrote a sign that said "Tainted!" at super vampy-speed. I walked by Newton's booth and stuck it on. "How's it going Newton?" I asked him.

"Great! How about you guys?" He asked somewhat nervously.

"Pretty good. Pretty good," I just walked away. He was mumbling something under his breath about us being crazy. When I got back to Ness and I's booth, we only had about forty boxes left. It was getting dark out and I could see that Nessie was getting tired. "I think we should get back to the house, Ness. It's getting pretty dark," I said.

"But Uncy Emmy! We'll never win if we stop now!" She knew I had a soft spot for that name! Then I had a bright idea! Which acording to Rosalie, didn't happen that often.

"What if I buy the rest of the boxes?" I had no clue what I would do with forty boxes of cookies, but if it would help Nessie, I was up for it. After she agreed to it, and I spent like eighty dollars on cookies that I couldn't even eat, I got Nessie home.

The next day we went to another Girl Scout meeting. They were going to announce the winner of the cookie sale. "And the winner is..." the rubber cement lady took a dramatic pause, "Renesmee Cullen!" Nessie and I cheered. But what were we supposed to do with another bike? As Nessie accepted the bike, I saw Paige Newton crying. It broke my heart actually.

"Nessie, why don't you give the bike to Paige? It would be the good thing to do," Not all Newtons could be evil I guess.

"Fine," She sighed. She walked over to Paige and handed her the bike, " I already have a bike. You can have it. You know, if you want," She was such a sweetheart!

"Thank you, Nessie! Thank you! I never had a bike before!" Paige didn't seem like such a bad kid!

"You're welcome!" Nessie smiled at her and walked away. Nessie really learned a lesson today. I don't know what it was. But she learned one.

We headed back to the house after that. Suddenly, I was confronted by Edward. "What the heck are we supposed to do with forty boxes of Girl Scout cookies?" He was mad.

"I don't know!" I screamed. And with that I was being chased in the forest by a crazy vampire. **Fan-freaking-tastic.**

A/N Hey guys. Do you think I should write more Emmett fics? They're a lot more fun to write! Read and Review please! I really hope you think my fanfic was fan-freaking-tastic!

Lots of Fan-Fic love,

Gina aka Jaspersx3mine.


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